Rationalization for Settling

Still haven’t heard back from the high school I applied to for the guidance counselor position, but I honestly don’t really care. I was having thoughts about whether or not I wanted to work there, and my gut feeling told me that I wouldn’t like it. It involves way too much “school stuff” such as scheduling classes, and I personally feel like I didn’t get this degree to schedule classes for people. I want to be a counselor. My would be supervisor told me that I would do very little actual counseling if I got the job, and I just don’t think I’m OK with that. So if they don’t call, I won’t be upset, in fact, I’ll be relieved in a way.

Here’s the rationalization part. I love the hospital that I work at, and I really want nothing other than to work there. My problem is the pay. It’s horrible, and it’s a hospital that’s known for paying very little. I’m trying to find ways to come to terms with the low pay, but it’s just not happening. I get along really well with everybody and it’s the best psyc hospital I’ve seen in Louisiana. I feel like I’m becoming part of the team, they’re giving me more responsibility, and I just feel like I’m in a very comfortable fit at this place. I’ve been putting the word out more and more to people there that I would like to work there when I graduate but that the pay would need to be a little higher. Maybe someone will hear that and suggest something. I’ve been told by my supervisor and one of the other social workers that they would like to have me and they can’t wait until I graduate. That’s very flattering.

Here’s my rationalization: My ultimate goal is to go into private practice, which is hugely in demand right now in New Orleans. In order to do this I need my LPC. We have LPC supervisors at the hospital. If I can work my supervision being payed for into my contract, that would figuratively add $5000 to my salary ($100/week for 50 weeks). Once I have my LPC, I can start a private practice and supplement my income at the hospital with that. Or if all works well, do only private practice. I’d also have my foot in the door for private practice because we’re always looking for outside therapists for our clients for after they’re discharged. I honestly just want to stay where I am when I graduate, because I know I’d be happy, and to an extent, that matters more than money. At the same time, I need to make enough money to at least pay my bills. So what do I do?

I got the best complement today. One of my patients asked me if I do private practice, and I told her that no, that’s why I’m in school right now so that I can get to that point. She then told me that she wishes I did, because I’m the first therapist that she’s ever felt comfortable with and been able to open up to, and she feels like I’ve really helped her. That made me smile, and at the same time made me upset that she’s never had a therapist that she could be comfortable with.

I guess what I’m getting at is that I know I would be happy at the hospital and I can do the type of work that I really want to do. I want to deal with clinical cases. And maybe I can find a way to adjust my life to be able to live with the salary. Eventually, the salary will be where I want it to be, I may just have to accept that I’m going to start off on the low end.


Like Looking in a Mirror

When I walked into group this morning I was very taken aback. One of our new clients sat there in his chair looking very depressed. He had longish hair, black eyeliner that was obviously smeared from last night, chipped black nail polish, and a Nine Inch Nails shirt. For those who knew me about 10 years ago, this sounds like an adequate description of myself. Talk about your transference issues! It got me thinking later in the day about how much life has changed since then and more eerily, how much things really haven’t changed.

At 16 years of age, I was known to wear the occasional eye liner, dress in all black, write horribly depressing poetry, and read Poppy Z. Brite books while listening to Nine Inch Nails. My outward appearance has changed and my rebellion has gone away, but I still hold that love for all things artistic. Poppy Z. Brite has changed to Orson Scott Card, Nine Inch Nails has changed to The Shins, but the basic skeleton of my life back then hasn’t changed all that much. And I think that’s a good thing. I feel like I’ve shed the skin that needed to be shed from back then, but the insides have still remained the same, and I’m happy with that. I only hope that this client that reminded me so much of myself at his age ends up with as good of a deal as I got, and I hope that I can help him on his way there.

Eerily enough, on my way home I was listening to Lucy on XM Radio which is the “90’s alt rock” channel. They informed me that Nine Inch Nails has a new album coming out on April 17th. Back then (in the 90’s) I owned every Nine Inch Nails album and every single, all the VHS tapes and the books, and knew every fact about Nine Inch Nails and Trent Reznor that one would like to know. Now I don’t even know about a new album until a month before it comes out. No hard feelings there. But I will be picking up that album on April 17th 🙂

Tim Sale: The Artist behind Heroes

Just a couple of hours ago I wrote a post about Heroes and mentioned the painter, Tim Sale who does Isaac’s art. After a very helpful comment from Carl V., I discovered that I knew this artist and didn’t even know that I knew him.

Tim Sale is a comic book artist that is brilliant! I know him from the Daredevil: Yellow mini series. I picked this series up a few years back from the local comic shop and I’ve always loved it. I’ve gone back to it quite a few times. The art stood out to me back then. I thought it was wonderful, and see now that Tim Sale is in fact a wonderful artist.

I also discovered a book that he did called Spiderman: Blue. Had no idea about this one. Must have come out right after I decided that I was spending too much money on comics and sadly closed my folder at the local shop. Spiderman’s always been my favorite since I was a little kid and unfortunately I lost track of all the spin off books a few years back. I’ll be picking up the TPB through Amazon. He’s also done books on Catwoman, Batman (The Long Halloween looks great even though I’m not a DC fan), The Hulk: Gray, and has an art book out called Tim Sale: Black & White which chronicles many of his paintings and sketches.

Now that I think about it, I have made a few exceptions to my “no DC” stance when it comes to Batman. Arkham Asylum was great with fabulous artwork by the wonderful Dave McKean.

My prediction is that Heroes will release an art book with Isaac/Tim’s work. I’d definitely buy that (wink wink to the NBC executives). I love discovering (or re-discovering) new artists!

I Love DVR

This is a post about nothing really. I just feel like blogging, so I decided that I shall just type and see what spills out onto the computer screen.

I have a new love in my life and her name is DVR (Yes, I’m a tad delirious from a very long day). In fact, I am currently DVR-ing Heroes even though I could probably just watch it now rather than recording it and watching it later. Now there’s no more worrying about having to possibly skip class late on Monday nights to watch Heroes (yes I’m that addicted to this show). Heroes truly is a wonderful show. It’s like a new Marvel movie every week. I was so excited when Marvel started doing all of their movies, now I get a new live action comic book every week. I love the art in Heroes that Isaac does. He would be the really cool guy who’s eyes roll back in his head as he paints the future. The artist who actually does the paintings is named Tim Sale. I’d like to see more of his work.

I’m currently reading Cell by Stephen King, and I must say that it is much better than I thought it would be. I pictured a trapped in a phone booth kind of book, but it’s totally not that. It’s actually a really great zombie story so far. My little brother got it for me as a christmas gift when he saw that I was reading Lisey’s Story. I didn’t know if I would like it, but it’s really good so far. I’ve never considered myself a Stephen King fan, but these latest books are great. Sure they’re a little pulpy, but still a fun read.

Dinner time. Hope everyone’s week got off to an ok start…mine was just long, and tomorrow will be longer.

And the Oscar Goes to….

The Oscars kept me up past my bedtime tonight, so I guess a few minutes to tell my thoughts on them won’t hurt….

Guess I’ll be seeing the Departed. It won the big two so I guess I’ll check it out. I didn’t think I’d like it too much, but then again I didn’t think I’d like Million Dollar Baby when it won and it was great. I’d also really like to see The Queen and Volver…they both look great.

Pan’s Labyrinth: I’m so proud of that movie. It won Best Art Direction, Achievement in Makeup, and Best Cinematography. You look at those categories and it’s obvious that Pan’s Labyrinth deserves all of those awards. Hands down, an incredible film. I would’ve liked to see it win more, but I was happy it got what it did. I definitely would’ve liked to see it win best original score. That music was so haunting and every time I hear it I fall right back into that movie.

I would’ve liked to see Children of Men win best Film Editing or something along those lines. That was such a terrific movie and I don’t see how film editing gets much better than that.

I was so glad to see Marie Antoinette win Best Costume Design. I thought that was such a great movie, but I’m very partial to Sofia Coppola, she’s an amazing director. I was glad to see it win something and would’ve been very surprised if it hadn’t won that award.

It was great to see Jennifer Hudson win best supporting actress. You can just see the passion in her and she’s such a humble person. I haven’t seen Dream Girls and probably won’t, but that performance was great. Beyonce just keeps impressing me at these award shows. I was shocked that it didn’t win best original song, but then again, surprise surprise, Melissa Etheridge wins for An Inconvenient Truth. Could we scream Political Statement a little louder? And of course, An Inconvenient Truth also won best Documentary.

Go Helen Mirren! She’s such a great actress and it was great to see her win Best Actress. I can’t wait to see The Queen. Looks like she did an incredible job.

Ellen did a great job hosting. I love Ellen, she’s just an awesome person all around and has the best sense of humor. Good choice there to have her host.

Other things I enjoyed about tonight:

– Kirsten Dunst and Tobey Maguire presenting together. A definite shout out to all of us comic fans.
– Robert Downey Jr.’s joke about himself
– The dance troupe that did all of those really cool silhouettes
– The sound effects choir

Tips For Blogging MeMe

So I got tagged by Stephanie for this blogging tips MeMe. Like her, I had nothing much to post about today :p so this works…and it’s pretty cool.

-Start Copy-

It’s very simple. When this is passed on to you, copy the whole thing, skim the list and put a * star beside those that you like. (Check out especially the * starred ones.)

Add the next number (1. 2. 3. 4. 5., etc.) and write your own blogging tip for other bloggers. Try to make your tip general.

After that, tag 10 other people. Link love some friends!

Just think- if 10 people start this, the 10 people pass it onto another 10 people, you have 100 links already!

1. Look, read, and learn. **-http://www.neonscent.com/

2. Be, EXCELLENT to each other. **-http://www.bushmackel.com/

3. Don’t let money change ya! *-http://www.therandomforest.info/

4. Always reply to your comments. ****-http://chattiekat.com/

5. Link liberally — it keeps you and your friends afloat in the Sea of Technorati. *-http://chipsquips.com/

6. Don’t give up – persistence is fertile. *-http://www.velcro-city.co.uk/

7. Give link credit where credit is due. ***-http://www.sfsignal.com/

8. Pictures say a thousand words and can usually add to any post.*-http://scifichick.com/

9. Visit all the bloggers that leave comments for you – it’s nice to know who is reading! ***-http://stephaniesbooks.blogspot.com/

10. Stick true to who you are and let your personality come through in your writing. Write about what you love and share it with others. – http://chrisa511.blogspot.com

-End Copy-

I hate tagging people for things, so I’m taking the lazy way out :p If you would like to carry this on, go ahead! It’s a simple one and I’d love to see the list as it grows. Hope this one comes back around.

Coming up later: The Harry Potter review….almost finished!

My New Room

So after a very long day of moving and an 8 hour work shift after that, I am officially settled into my new room. What a relief. Tomorrow will be what a Sunday was meant to be…a day of rest. Here’s a broad picture of the room. The wallpaper doesn’t look as bad in the picture, or maybe I’m just getting used to it. But everyone gasps when they see it.

I’m glad to just have my own space again. It feels great. I love the feeling of tranquility (in case you can’t tell by the many buddhas and candles) and I like my room to be a peaceful place. And I think I’ve done the best that I can with this space. I’m actually happy with it. The wallpaper’s even starting to grow on me. It’s actually kind of neat, I would just never choose it. It has all these different old ships and then descriptions and measurements written by each one. Maybe if I were 5 it would be cooler. I also got to display some art that I’ve been wanting to for awhile. Megan did the two drawings for me and also did the collage in the middle. I’ve always loved them, now I can display them. And in the middle is my Luck’s Dancer from Lisa Snellings-Clark.

And last but certainly not least, I finally have a bookshelf again. Though I only have maybe one tenth of the books I actually own with me. I’m constantly having to ship books off to my Gram’s house because there’s just never any room. Hopefully within the next month I’ll have all my books with me again. We’re getting 3 bookshelves for the living room and I’m moving all my books onto those. It’ll feel so good to have them all with me again. Here’s the beginning of a very good thing:

So now I shall retire after a long days work to the wonderful thing that I used to take for granted called “my room.”